Managing Hurt Feelings

by Genevieve Votra | April 24, 2023

We’ve all been hurt. We’ve all been betrayed. We’ve all been rejected or left out. What can we do if we are left feeling hurt? Here are six ways to manage your hurt feelings.

  1. Feel the hurt.  

When we don’t acknowledge our hurt, it boomerangs back to us, sometimes even stronger than it was before. Allowing ourselves to feel the hurt helps us move forward instead of wallowing in it. 

An effective way to recognize and move with our hurt feelings is to practice mindfulness. This trains your mind to focus on the here and now despite your racing emotions.

  1. Express your hurt in positive ways.

Taking time to feel to feel your hurt is a good thing, but make sure you are not wallowing. Sitting for days on end with our feelings stops us from healing. So does lashing out, which only makes things worse. It’s when we empty out our hurt, get to the root cause, and learn from it that we can move forward.

Journal your feelings. Write all your hurt out, without judgement. When you write what you feel on paper, you get the clarity that you need to sort out your feelings. 

  1. Manage your actions. 

Thinking of revenge or wanting to hurt back to the other person that has hurt you is normal.   But make sure that these thoughts don’t actually turn into actions. Acting out never leads to anything good, only more hurt and lots of regret.

When thoughts of revenge gets overwhelming, call a friend, someone who can put some sense into you. Consider a helpline if you don’t have anyone to talk to.

  1. Look after your well-being.

Positive activities can make us feel grounded and distract us from wallowing in our hurt feelings. This includes exercising, painting, volunteering, etc.

One surefire way we can improve our well-being is to be with people who supports us and appreciates us for what we are.

  1. Be kind to yourself.

When we are hurt, we tend to blame ourselves. We feel we are not good enough. Treat yourself with compassion. Be the friend that you need right now. This means giving yourself the time, empathy, and tender loving care that you need. 

Hopefully, these suggestions will go a long way in helping you manage your hurt feelings. It may be hard to get past your hurt feelings, but it is not impossible. You can move on and feel good again.

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